My Chore System

I just wrote this in an email for one of Rob's staff who was wondering what I did for the kids' chores. And I figured I would share it with friends. Basically, I've found what works for me, and I would like to hear what you do, too.

My chore system.

It's really quite simple. And it's based on choices. My kids easily get bored with doing the same thing over and over, so I knew from the start that I couldn't just assign them chores. I also can't keep up with chore charts. I'm good about using them for about a week, then I forget to refer to them and, therefore, so do my kids. What I use are chore cards. One chore is written on each card. As I was setting them up, I divided them into different colors that represent what needs to be done daily, weekly (or less than daily but maybe a few times a week, like laundry), monthly, as needed (like wash and vacuum the van), and seasonally (like gardening, shoveling snow, taking out or putting away seasonal decor). I used colored index cards, which I cut in half so they could go farther.

I then thought about my day and the chores that need to be done daily, weekly, monthly, etc and wrote them out on the cards. I also broke them down so they could be handled in portions (including the parts my kids prefer), like a 4 year old could do part of the breakfast cleanup or gather the laundry or sort the laundry. That was based on what I feel like I can delegate (some chores I feel like I should be the one doing them, you know, until my kids are older and responsible enough to handle them).

That's it. And it's really easy to implement...even when I don't feel like doing much. When Rob's home, I can just have the cards sitting on the table and let him know I need help and he can choose what to do, too. In the morning, preferably during breakfast, I go through the stack and decide what needs to be done. I only require my kids to do one job, extra jobs they can earn extra money for (I'm cheap...$.10/job, unless it's a big one, then $.25...they're still young!). On bigger job days, I will require them to do two or three. Often, I find that if I pull out a monthly one, they jump for the chance to do it since it's more fun (like washing/vacuuming the car). They have personal responsibilities that are not included in the chore cards...like making their beds, cleaning up their bowls and plates after meals, picking up their toys and messes, and my 6yo's daily chore is to take care of his lizard.

Also, since they are young, I consider them "in training" for most of the chores. I let my kids clean toilets and wash sinks and lots of other things that they aren't fully capable of, but I'm right there with them and "making sure" it's done right. When they are able to do the chore competently and independently, I let them take over the chore completely. And that's awesome.

On a separate level, I have set up a "Life Skills" notebook for my boys. I got the idea from a book called "The Parenting Breakthrough" (Or Breakthrough Parenting?) where the mom writes about how she implemented a chore and allowance and savings system for her 4 boys while they grew up...to teach them the importance of work and the value of money. She has an age-based break-down of what kinds of chores and skills are good for age groups. And she would go through a process of introducing a chore to the child, training them, then letting them master it. With this in mind, I decided to create a Life Skills notebook that tracks my kids' progress of the things they learn and are able to do. They can also make personal goals and work towards those goals. This goes beyond the chore card system, but it's nice for them and me to see how they are progressing in Life Skills. Also, since I'm pregnant, I haven't been diligent about it. But once about every 3 months, we do pull them out to see what the kids have learned just by living life. And there is always something they can pass off.